If you have any suggestions for internet clichés you think I should fulfil, then please let me know. I want your ideas.

As you can see from her blog: Paris, j’taime Klee and I had an amazing time in Paris. Very fun and the break was ruddy needed. I’m not going to reblog what she already has, so here is a little video I made from stuff filmed whilst over there on NYE and NYD.

If you like the tune, find out about it here.

I hope you had a great new years whatever you did. Bring on 2012, the sporty bastard of a year.

Since it’s been so long, I decided it’s about time I ventured on a train and went all the way to see Klee in Newcastle! Luckily, I love lonely train journeys.

The Quayside in Newcastle is stunning, at day and night. The Gateshead Millennium Bridge is gorgeous all lit up, alongside The Sage…

Being able to walk under the Tyne Bridge is just awe inspiring. Walking along Tower Bridge in london is something, but it’s weird being able to walk UNDER the Tyne Bridge, it’s gorgeous.

Speaking of awe inspiring, one of my favourite modern artists is Antony Gormley, so there was no way in hell I was visiting Newcastle without seeing the angel.

It’s just gorgeous. Surprisingly smaller than I imagined which is a bit of a disappointment on first inspection, but after a few seconds, I was over it and just took in the magnificent Angel Of The North.

Tyneside Cinema based at Monument were showing retro christmas films, and were showing Home Alone! We didn’t get in as they were sold out (I was a very sad sebby at that moment) but not all was lost, because NE1 were showing films at the momument with deck chairs and blankets under marquees facing a big screen. We watched National Lampoons Christmas Vacation!

I couldn’t come to Newcastle this close to Christmas without popping into the Metro Centre to do some christmas shopping! It was huge. Someone remind me that I hate shopping centres next year please.

That being said, walking up and down Newcastle’s streets, there is one reoccurring thing I kept seeing… GREGGS. They are ruddy EVERYWHERE. Literally in every shopping centre (of which there are millions), but also on every street, market – just everywhere. I did however find one special Greggs that doesn’t do pasties or sausage rolls… The Greggs Moments cafe!

On the day I left, I spent some time around Klee’s house which means I GOT TO HANG OUT WITH HER CUTE DOG LOUIE OMG SO CUTE.

If you are thinking about going to Newcastle, then I thoroughly recommend it. Just make sure you’re wrapped up warm.

I have one bit of advice: avoid Very.co.uk – if you’re shopping for something that is easily or highly faked.

Why do I say this? Well, good question. I’ve been shopping with Very for almost two years now. Up until very recently I’ve been very happy with the customer service. I’ve bought a bike, playstation, blackberry, suit, jeans and other things from Very and been very happy with the service the provided.

For the last few months I’ve been craving to buy some Dr Dre Beats headphones (I’m a wanker, I know). I ordered some from Very. Some white studio beats for £299. THESE in fact.

Once ordered, I was VERY excited about receiving them! Now, unlike the most things that come from Very in what I would imagine to be a central warehouse, these weren’t going to take the usual very speedy delivery of a day or two, these were going to take 11 days to arrive. Why? Because as one customer service agent said on the phone, they ‘had to come from an external distributor’.

When they arrived, first thing I did was get the all turned on, made sure they worked… They sounded great. Now, the iPhone inline remote… That did…n’t work. What? Why doesn’t the iPhone remote thingy work? Let me try to make a call with it. I called Klee, and she couldn’t hear me at all. Just a loud hiss. I tried a few times to no avail.

What? Come to think about the box was a tiny bit beaten when I got it, maybe it’s not because it came in a bigger box with no bubble wrap, but maybe it’s because they were refurbished? Nah! Very wouldn’t do that… So I got googling and found this page: the Beats by Dr Dre Verify Before You Buy page.

So I entered the serial number in there and WHAT? BOOM:

Just ridiculous.

I am unable to confirm if the headphones that Very sent me are counterfeits or not, and I was unwilling to send them to Beats as I wanted my money back and thanks to distance selling laws I have 14 days to return. But if this website is to be believed, then Very need to be worried about their distributors/suppliers.

Now, this should be the end of the post here? yes? NO. I am frustrated about Very because of their delivery service, YODEL.

I thought my main gripe with YODEL was that their delivery time is between 7am and 7pm. THEY GIVE THEMSELVES A 12 HOUR WINDOW. If you want special delivery, then you get between 7am and 12pm. I ordered something on special delivery once – it came at 6pm.

But no, it’s that they use the excuse of Christmas to be bone idle fucking lazy. I arranged for the suspected counterfeit Beats headphones to be picked up on Tuesday (anytime between 7am and 7pm) so I stayed home on tuesday, cancelled meetings… and they didn’t turn up, at all. So I reorganised my return date for Thursday (anytime between 7am and 7pm) and once again stayed home, cancelled meetings – AND THEY DIDN’T TURN UP AGAIN.

Last night I felt a bit sick, so I came back early (at about 7pm) and guess what? Without booking a return slot, Yodel turned up at around 7:45pm.

WHO DO THEY THINK THEY ARE? Obviously not a serious company that looks after their customers. How about this – if you don’t have the resources to deliver what you say you can, then don’t agree to the work. There was and still is no sign of Very apologising for this complete fuck up, let alone finding a reason from YODEL.

When I called Very on Friday night to confirm that Yodel had picked up the package, I was told that the reason they didn’t come Tuesday or Thursday, and turned up on a Friday night when I was actually bound to be out, was that YODEL are concentrating on delivering Christmas gifts and putting returns at the back of the priority list.

BACK OF THE PRIORITY LIST? Not only is that saying they don’t care if they, or their customers are getting their monies worth from YODEL, but it’s also leaving thinking open to the idea that they might want to inconvenience customers so that they run out of time to return goods. Especially goods that are expensive.

I don’t think that is the case, but I don’t want to believe that Very has over the last year gone from my favourite online retailer for customer service, to a retailer that I now actively want to boycott.

Klee and I are obsessed with this advert. Every time either of us sees it we text eachother with “WINTAH :(“… Have a look at the advert here. I just LOVE it.

In other news I’ve been busting my new winter jumper out and about. Not really note worthy but I did buy it in Forever 21, which is the biggest, glitteriest, pile of wank. Isn’t it?

Yes, that’s @kleebelle (and her blog is here). Also, yes, that’s the bear kigu I wore on stage with The 2 Bears at Green Man and no, I haven’t washed it since. Soz Klee.

We went dahn Brick Lane and walked around Spitalfields market, we didn’t buy anything (although I wanted to buy a hunter waistcoat for £15 – Klee wouldn’t let me.)

I surprised her with going to the Zoo. We saw the penguin feeding time. LOTS OF FISH.

We had a little picnic nearby to a canal and used shoes as bottle holders, which yes was my genius idea (using my stupid shoes)…

We went down for a stroll through Camden, I cooked a lovely Spinach and Feta Filo Pie (which was gorgeous btw, I am an amazing host). It was all, as apparently the cockneys say, cushty.

On the following Monday we went to Klee’s friends birthday celebrations where another of Klee’s friends Liv and I pull faces in some photos. I LOVE THESE PHOTOS. I just love pulling faces. Klee’s mega lazer eyes of death were a bit worrying though…

So anyway, the reason for blogging is to let you know I’m alive, rather happy, and rediscovered that I like pulling faces.

On a side note, I really hope this is a character. If it is, I think he’s got a long future ahead of him.

Seeing as this week is London Fashion Week, I’ve come to evaluate where I stand on a few things and realised I believe men’s fashion is boring compared to women’s fashion. So how can I make my outfits more fun and lively, without compromising my semi-professional, casual freelance attire? I plan to do it with shoes.

These are the shoes I wore today, for the first time…

These glorious gold sparkly DMs I picked up off eBay for less than £10, and I genuinely love them. They are a bit out there and I’m sure I’d suit wearing them more if part of Sink the Pink or something, but I still love them and plan to wear them with my normal clothes.

If I use these shoes, it means I can give my furry pink animal print slip on’s a rest…

So the moral of the story is, shoes are cool… and if you find some amazingly camp shoes size 11 online, send me the link!